Pain
There are several types of pain in the world.
One of it is pain in the beauty way which we say that 'pain pays the income of every precious thing'.
while another one is pain in an unforgettable and impressive way.
Normally,
we tend to choose the pain that create beauty such as the point toes of a ballerina.
But sometimes,
we got no avoid to the impressive pain.
At the worst,
it would happened more than once.
At the same, you couldn't avoid it.
That's life!
We just deservedly and unavoidably suffered in an unwanted way :(
We just deservedly and unavoidably suffered in an unwanted way :(
I keep telling myself
'She is a visitor who just leave a footprint in my life, she comes and left away quickly.'
But miraculously, on the last day of my high school life,
she gave me a gift of grief and a souvenir of pain which make me bitterly commemorate her till now.
But technically I know that pain is an indeed miserable thing,
because pain has no limit, it doesn't has any moral value,
But technically I know that pain is an indeed miserable thing,
because pain has no limit, it doesn't has any moral value,
it doesn't know our painful level when it happen.
At worst,
we even inescapably found and recreate pain in our dreams.
Miserably,
the flashbacks and nightmares unstoppable hunt me throughout this three years.
And invisibly,
tears had slowly became a sort of companionship :(
Anxieties, delusions, flashbacks, insecurities, nightmares, suicidal thoughts, trauma, worries and unforgettable images will never stop hunting me in each day.
But, anyway,
I still have a bunch of silly buddies as the best therapy of my fourth-year trauma.
They heal and bring hurray into my life,
especially Cornelia, another hyperactive one in the house :X
But sometimes,
I really get fade up of her because her uncontrollable noisiness,
she non stop created murmurs all the times especially I was doing assignment,
colliding the tables and chairs; running around with the boys and kicking football in the living room.
At times, when I was doing assignment in the room; I can't even get a peace.
I really throw tantrum in the room; I smacked the table when I heard her unstoppable thunderstorm laughter from the living room.
Seriously, nobody can controls her !
Two neighbors had complaint the loudness for several times, Ada had refused to stay together with us because of her noisiness, Frances had quit us this group of friends because of her freaking noisiness.
(Frances- yellow shirt)
(Ada said she is too noisy so unwilling to stay with us)
But she still behaved the same way and could not control herself.
Even now, I am blogging,
I still heard her freaking loud noises from the living room which make my mind blank and do not now what to write now.
Well,
I would not discriminate her because of her uncontrollable behavior,
I just disliked she created so much noise when I am seriously doing important assignment,
when we one bunch of girls hanging outside, no matter how noisy she was,
I accepted and appreciated, I play around and laugh around.
Because I knew that its time to laugh when we hanging out !
But at times,
her hyperactivity is really beyond the limit, even I also don't behave that way.
When Carol and me walked together with her on the street,
she screamed and sang loudly and make people stared at us.
Carol asked her to keep quiet, she even doesn't care at all and continued doing that.
When Gerald and Jackie walked together with us,
she pulled their hairs and kicked their legs harshly from behind.
At home, she is even too much!
She took the needle and playing chasing with Jackie,
they running around in the kitchen and when she get to chased him,
she even took the needle and poked Jackie's leg!
I thought she was just playing and making fun,
who knows when I heard from Carol, Jackie's leg got bleeding!
Besides than that,
when we went to the Chinese restaurant having dinner,
she even disturbed them by using her oily dim-sum chopsticks; rinsed and stirred into their chinese tea.
It was really disgusting to seen that :X
When I was in a bad mood, I really get frustrated from what she did.
But since we are close friend, I just feel embarrass and keep quiet about all those in front of her :D
But, still have a lot of 'Buts' !!!!
But sometimes,
she is really too annoying when we stay under a same roof and sleep together in a same room.
When I sleeping in the midnight,
she played in the living room and laughed loudly till woken me up,
then SUAN LIAO!
When 3 of us sleeping in the early morning,
when there was an outsider pushing a trash-roller passed by,
the noise waken her, and she would uttered babyish crying sounds!
And her babyish crying sounds woken me up!
Oh gosh!
Its really hard to for me have a good sleep with the presence of her :X
But anyway,
she is still one of my best playmate, hence we stay under a same roof and we should tolerate each other :)
And,
SHOPPING AND OUTING IS THE ONLY WAY COULD FADE AWAY THOSE IRRITABLE FEELING :D
we even inescapably found and recreate pain in our dreams.
Miserably,
the flashbacks and nightmares unstoppable hunt me throughout this three years.
And invisibly,
tears had slowly became a sort of companionship :(
Anxieties, delusions, flashbacks, insecurities, nightmares, suicidal thoughts, trauma, worries and unforgettable images will never stop hunting me in each day.
But, anyway,
I still have a bunch of silly buddies as the best therapy of my fourth-year trauma.
They heal and bring hurray into my life,
especially Cornelia, another hyperactive one in the house :X
But sometimes,
I really get fade up of her because her uncontrollable noisiness,
she non stop created murmurs all the times especially I was doing assignment,
colliding the tables and chairs; running around with the boys and kicking football in the living room.
At times, when I was doing assignment in the room; I can't even get a peace.
I really throw tantrum in the room; I smacked the table when I heard her unstoppable thunderstorm laughter from the living room.
Seriously, nobody can controls her !
Two neighbors had complaint the loudness for several times, Ada had refused to stay together with us because of her noisiness, Frances had quit us this group of friends because of her freaking noisiness.
(Frances- yellow shirt)
(Ada said she is too noisy so unwilling to stay with us)
But she still behaved the same way and could not control herself.
Even now, I am blogging,
I still heard her freaking loud noises from the living room which make my mind blank and do not now what to write now.
Well,
I would not discriminate her because of her uncontrollable behavior,
I just disliked she created so much noise when I am seriously doing important assignment,
when we one bunch of girls hanging outside, no matter how noisy she was,
I accepted and appreciated, I play around and laugh around.
Because I knew that its time to laugh when we hanging out !
But at times,
her hyperactivity is really beyond the limit, even I also don't behave that way.
When Carol and me walked together with her on the street,
she screamed and sang loudly and make people stared at us.
Carol asked her to keep quiet, she even doesn't care at all and continued doing that.
When Gerald and Jackie walked together with us,
she pulled their hairs and kicked their legs harshly from behind.
At home, she is even too much!
She took the needle and playing chasing with Jackie,
they running around in the kitchen and when she get to chased him,
she even took the needle and poked Jackie's leg!
I thought she was just playing and making fun,
who knows when I heard from Carol, Jackie's leg got bleeding!
Besides than that,
when we went to the Chinese restaurant having dinner,
she even disturbed them by using her oily dim-sum chopsticks; rinsed and stirred into their chinese tea.
It was really disgusting to seen that :X
When I was in a bad mood, I really get frustrated from what she did.
But since we are close friend, I just feel embarrass and keep quiet about all those in front of her :D
But, still have a lot of 'Buts' !!!!
But sometimes,
she is really too annoying when we stay under a same roof and sleep together in a same room.
When I sleeping in the midnight,
she played in the living room and laughed loudly till woken me up,
then SUAN LIAO!
When 3 of us sleeping in the early morning,
when there was an outsider pushing a trash-roller passed by,
the noise waken her, and she would uttered babyish crying sounds!
And her babyish crying sounds woken me up!
Oh gosh!
Its really hard to for me have a good sleep with the presence of her :X
But anyway,
she is still one of my best playmate, hence we stay under a same roof and we should tolerate each other :)
And,
SHOPPING AND OUTING IS THE ONLY WAY COULD FADE AWAY THOSE IRRITABLE FEELING :D
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