Periodic stress

Every time when I returned to Australia,

I'll definitely experienced first week of periodic stress,

I can't run away from that stress,

know why??!!

Whenever I came back to Australia,

have to clean up the extremely dusty house once again, pay up all sorts of massive bills, experienced extreme weather either overcool or overheat natural phenomena, running market up and down, spending large amount of time in transportation as well as the most crucially undergoing tougher education. 

Well,

ain't that life is explained by this way?

It's only getting tougher instead of easier as we climbing up the life ladder.

Besides than that,

one of the worst things in the world is that bygones are bygones,

no matter how hard we tried,

it's impossible for us to put down those horrible things,

it's hard to tell ourselves not to think about those unhappy moments and let time fade off everything,

but still,

when stress and boredom strikes,

sadness is always in our deep down,

I meant not only 'me' but all of us experience the mutual concept as all of us are homo sappien in the world.

To be factual,

I have been being tortured and yelling for all the time,

seems like no one could able to save me and heal my wounds,

and shopping have been become a common thing for me to heal my wound,

know what's the solid reason?

It's because shopping is always cheaper than a psychiatrist.

Overspent is the best way to rub off the inner suffering,

I bet people who suffered trauma like me will definitely behaved the same way as me,

we have a quite common background,

usually strong family background yet hollow like hell in the deep down,

our hearts were sunken and tears were dried for so long.

Some of them are unparented, a part of them are being abandoned while majority of them are same like me,

depressed for years and didn't attain any happiness in life - the main causes typically undergone certain traumas,

so being materialistic is the best way to vent out all these unhappiness and also the best way to balance our life.

At least, we gain some happiness from another aspects of life.

These two years, notably I happier a lot,

tears were significantly reduced and smiles were doubtlessly increased.

It's uncommon but dubious for someone requested me to smile,

deep down I'm asking myself that her real intention wish me to smile or cry?

I do not know,

but significantly my bottom happier a lot when I see the smiley.